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Letting Go: A Parent’s Perspective

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By: Naomi Tsujimura

It has been said that the main advantage to having more than one child in a family is that parents can practice on the first born. Three children and 20 plus years later, my husband and I are still staring at one another saying, “I don’t know. That’s your side of the family coming through. You figure it out.”  So much for practice makes perfect!

A list maker, a task master, and a planner, our oldest child, Miyuki Ruth, decided to pursue a major in architecture during her junior year in high school. A week at UNC Charlotte’s architecture camp in the summer before her senior year sealed the deal. UNC Charlotte, with its vibrant and engaged faculty, exciting urban location, and diverse student body was where she wanted to be.

After what seemed like an eternity of applications, portfolio submissions, interviews, and waiting for “the letter,” it felt as if the world went into hyper-drive as we found ourselves saying our goodbyes in the dorm parking lot on that sticky, hot August day.

The silence on the ride home was crushing. I think I stopped crying at exit 111; my husband swears it was when we pulled into the driveway back home. Where did the years go? 

Emails and phone calls filled with exciting news, reports of adventures, along with some moments of frustration and disappointment chronicled our daughter’s first year at UNC Charlotte.  We all survived the dreaded “first Christmas break” back home and this time when we dropped her off, I stopped crying by the time we got to exit 48. By the time she returned to Charlotte after spring break, all eyes were dry as we headed home. 

Now our twins, who are three years younger than their sister, are seniors in high school and preparing to take those next big steps to college.  Our son Toshiya, happy go lucky, musically inclined, and definitely NOT a list maker, began his college search looking for a school that would offer him opportunities academically, musically, and  culturally. 

After a year filled with “gentle” maternal reminders to complete applications, send in transcripts and get those recommendations completed, he too decided on UNC Charlotte for many of the same reasons as did his older sister. He was impressed with the faculty he had met during open houses. The variety of academic programs (engineering, international studies, criminal justice) was exciting. The opportunities to experience “big city life,” during his college years, along with an amazing array of opportunities on campus (student government, wind ensemble, theater, the outdoor VENTURE programming, athletics, intramurals, everything!) led him to UNC Charlotte. To him, UNC Charlotte had “a big school setting with a small school feel.”
 
Now my husband and I face the exciting and somewhat terrifying prospect of having three children in college at the same time this fall. While there are plenty of unknowns (like how many ways can we prepare beans and peanut butter to stretch that budget!) we feel strongly that UNC Charlotte is a great place for our two very “different” children.

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